World exclusive – how to get into the Saatchi 40th party, be a topless body paint model!

Yes readers, if you’re still miffed that you haven’t received your invitation to the Saatchi & Saatchi/M&C Saatchi 40th birthday party on Thursday, this is what you do.

The organisers are looking for three models willing to submit themselves to topless body painting (the party is to be held at the Saatchi Gallery after all). All you need to be is be between 5′ 7” and 5′ 11” (in heels), respect the dress code of white briefs, thong and heels and be broadminded about being coated in Dulux. And female. And you will probably have to audition first.

The style will be ‘avant-garde.’

And you’ll be paid a princely £25 in expenses (this will undoubtedly attract all Wayne Rooney’s female friends down from Manchester).

Phew, what an opportunity.

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About Angie Dean